The Social Deep Blog"Life is so much more than the white-washed perspective of some ID-driven ape." |
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There is a buzz developing around the systemic sexism that echoes the patriarchal delusion of male superiority. It is ironic how the same people posted at the top of the social hierarchy are the ones lost in the rose-coloured fog of dissonance. They see the inequity…backwards, of course, clinging to unearned authority over what’s “right.” Tensions build from every angle, and blame is cast on misandry as the antagonist. This mordant perspective, by hard-heartedly dismissing the lived experience of everyone else, fuels the very manifestation of antipathy towards cis men that it claims to oppose. It minimizes the fundamentally trauma-informed byproduct growing from the epicenter of the impossible demands of patriarchal social construction. Still, lack of accountability and the denial of science lead society down a darkening path of destruction—and the centuries-old self-deception peals, loud and oppressive. Society’s inescapable patriarchal structures inflict profound damage and enable severe, intersectional oppression against women and gender-nonconforming individuals—realities often dismissed by a misguided focus on misandry, underscoring an urgent need for accountability and genuine societal transformation.
People talk about the patriarchy like it signals male superiority, when in reality none of them can achieve, let alone define how it actually impacts their daily lives. They don’t name it, of course, but it bleeds into every conversation, every law, every social shift.
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According to my explorations on the topic, sexual victimization has been around since the dawn of time. Today, “sexual victimization is highly prevalent in the United States, with 63% of women and 24% of men reporting experiences of sexual victimization in their lifetime” (Miller, 2017). Research published in the Journal of the American Heart Association finds that sexual violence is not only common but that survivors of sexual assault and workplace sexual harassment are at an increased risk of hypertension (States News, 2022). This research was supported by several other institutions. In today’s world, it is also important to understand that victimization is not solely a physical act. Image-based sexual abuse has also been documented, its “prevalence varies, owing to differences in definitions, criteria, and samples used” (Pedersen et al., 2023).
* This is a unique social experiment: writing to individuals behind bars. This journey isn't about judgment or condemnation; it's about forging exploring dark complexities of the human experience. Each individual will have their own feed under the "Pen Pals" category. There will be real-time updates on this project as it unfolds (which may take time), and I welcome your suggestions and feedback along the way. Ed Kemper was denied parole, again, on July 9th, 2024, with the prosecution declaring him to still be a danger to society. This comes as no surprise to those familiar with this notorious serial killer, as the heinousness of his crimes is overshadowed only by his lack of both remorse and empathy. Today, Kemper resides in a medical prison where he was moved after several trips to an outside hospital due to complications with his severe diabetes. Other than that, unverified sources say he is otherwise relatively healthy and can still walk though he frequently uses a wheelchair to get around. Another source said that Kemper recently met with a journalist numerous times, in person and over the phone, insinuating that there should be a new book or documentary coming in the near future. Disappointingly, no title or release date was given; but he has been featured in several newer works. As well, since being incarcerated Kemper has recorded thousands of hours of audiobook narration and assisted the FBI in the development of their Behavioural Science Unit, though most recently he’s said to have accosted a female staffer while transferring into his wheelchair. This of course only worked against him at his parole hearing earlier this month, where he was denied (for the twelfth time). His is not my most familiar case, but not for lack of intrigue. I’ve watched some interviews and read a few articles, but I’ve not yet dove into the depths of his mind...
I held your daughter as she wept for you today. Not beside your deathbed or next to your grave, she didn’t cling to your picture but she is in mourning. She mourns the words of wisdom her heart aches to hear but she’s never heard you say, the loss of a blissful ignorance and hope. Her heart breaks every time you show her that you were never made to be the mother she so desperately needs, that you don’t have the grit and resolve to become that mother. I held her as she wept and I affirmed all her wildest dreams, except one; I won’t lie to her and allow her to hope that you will ever be half the woman she is already. A child, barely sixteen, and she is more self-aware and emotionally developed than you; her own mother. I have heard you utter the one word you are not capable of grasping the gravity of, and she believed you. She wants to believe you still; a part of her will always want to believe, that you’ve changed, that you understand, that you love her. With time and resilience, she will accept the truth and she will persevere despite you; or to spite you, either way, she will win. The truth is that without you, she really can’t lose. Sure, you’ve done your best, and it wasn’t easy for either; especially not “raising” such a high-spirited daughter, who just won’t submit. But then, that’s the real issue though, isn’t it?
Where to Begin
In my line of work, spirituality is a common topic of conversation. When dealing with trauma, it can be difficult to know where to turn or whom to trust and it can become debilitating learning to identify red flags of manipulation and genuine empathy. When you grow up being told that the people who are hurting you love you and want what’s best for you, those red flags become impossible to see. During the healing journey, an individual steps into their light and begins to see the blinders and identify errors in thinking that have perpetuated unhealthy patterns. This new perspective of their life and of their being, while promising and full of limitless potential, is terrifying. A new sense of vulnerability overwhelms the vulnerability they’ve known, and it’s that newness that is so intimidating. There is a strange comfort that exists in even the most toxic of familiar spaces. The demons you know become safer than the angels you cannot be certain exist. Looking into an uncharted and boundless future has a way of emphasizing how small some may feel, after trauma, yes, of course, but also as a symptom of shyness. The world seems so big when you feel so painfully small – and considering the notions of some omnipotent parental being having watched it all happen without interference sows trust issues on a whole new level. |
Sheena MonsterShe/They/Them/Theirs 
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